Will It Make You Blush

WILL IT MAKE YOU BLUSH?

My friend Harvey Helms is out with a new book shaking up the cosmetics industry called BLUSH.It’s kind of a kiss and put on the blush and blush and tell.I sometimes like to let writers interview themselves. Being Harvey is so funny I thought I would let him do the heavy lifting and let everyone know what theywant to about his book at the same time…How did we meet? Well Tracey I was enjoying my morning coffee watching the Today Show with Kathi Lee and Hoda and on you walked with your fabulous book “Between A rock And A Hot Place! It was love at first sight! I immediately wrote a column about you and your hysterically funny book for Betty Confidential! You became everyone’s fairy god mother!The rest as they say is history! What made you decide to write Blush?Other than the fact that you truly are a beauty junkie!? Answer- Crazy really! I was sitting in a movie theater in Ohio watching The Devil Wears Prada with a friend and people weren’t laughing in the right places! My friend said “Honey, this movie is sickly funny but it’s not real life.” It was definitely real life for me! I worked for that Miranda Priestly type character several times in my cosmetic career! I left the evening that night knowing I had to share my diary, blemishes and all!Plus I was almost murdered in college for being gay so I wanted to share my story so that young gays could know that things can get better. Enough of this bullying and suicide! Weren’t you one of the first men to sell behind a cosmetic counter in the south?- Yes Ma’am I was! Men in cosmetics departments today is the norm. When I started it was like I was part of a freak show that I vividly convey in the first chapter, “I’m the Revlon girl”.4.Was Tammy Faye Baker one of your customers? Did you do that to her? Answer- Yes she was and no I didn’t. We weren’t allowed to touch her so her “Signature Tammy Faye Look” was of her own doing. I loved her and she bought tons of make up from me. She wore the Estee Lauder fragrance Private Collection so we could smell her in the store before she ever made it to the department. She gave me her seal of approval-kind of like a kiss from cosmetics Gods.5.The conversations with your mother Grace are hysterical! Was she really like that? Answer- Absolutely! my mother was candy coated evil. I mean that in the best way possible. With her sweet southern accent she could tell you to kiss her ass and you’d reply “Why I’d love to!”You call Blush a “Traumedy?- Answer- My life has been a traumatic comedy. The crazy men I’ve loved in my life are worth the read You were marrying men before it was fashionable.Yes, but no spoiler alert here please darling! But you know we all love a glamorous Hollywood ending. Don’t you think this would be fabulous TV? Is there anything you would have done differently in your lifeMany things, but the top two that come to mind are:1. Start wearing sunblock immediately after coming out of my mother’s womb and..2. Begin using firming eye cream in the 7th grade!

Harvey 

A Beauty Junkie Ponders Globe Warming

The other day while I was inventorying my beauty warehouse — otherwise known as my bathroom — I started looking at ingredient listings on the back of some skin care boxes. Please make sure you always check those out before you buy any product! It lets you know what you’re getting. Today there is a huge trend in the beauty industry toward more natural and organic ingredients. Not just your free-range chicken breast for lunch girls, but your night cream too! Lavender? Soothing. Ginseng? Energizing. Kaolin? Purifying. There’s a gazillion! All from good ol’ Mother Earth. As I was applying a delicious chamomile body cream, I had a big, gay, horrific beauty vision. Could Global Warming hurt our skin care products?OMG!!!!! I ran to my iPhone and Googled Al Gore, who was awarded the triple crown for his global warming movie An Inconvenient Truth — Oscar, Nobel and Grammy! Up came this video:Danger Gay Robinson! I better get to the bottom of this! As your Cyber Main Gay, I went straight to the top! Ladies, meet Ken Caldeira! Climate Scientist, Geoengineer and Director of the Department of Global Ecology at the famed Carnegie Institution for Science at Stanford University.I was a little nervous meeting Ken because science was NOT my best subject in school. Okay girls it was the worst. Was Ken thinking, “What am I doing at lunch with this beauty queen?” No! It was the total opposite! His charm and down to earth personality put me right at ease. He has a great sense of humor and life philosophy.He said, “Happiness is feeling appreciated by friends and doing work that is meaningful. “You should also know that Ken walks the global warming talk! He personally lives the green life! Ken believes that great design is an important in lowering greenhouse gas emissions. I found this out when we went to lunch on his Vespa LX 150. He gave me a really fabulous helmet so I wouldn’t have any hair drama! His Stanford office is cooled by a misty water chamber rather than air conditioning. Impressive. In his mind he wears two hats: The Citizen who asks, “What should I do?” And the Scientist that asks, “How does it work?”As I was sipping my Diet Coke pondering what my first question would be, Ken said, “Harvey, like it or not, a climate emergency is a possibility. Climate change triggered by the accumulation of green house gasses (carbon dioxide or CO2) emitted into the atmosphere has the potential of causing serious and lasting damage to human and natural systems. Carbon dioxide is a villain insofar as an inanimate object can be a villain.Yes girls, I flash back to science class! HELP! Ken said, “Don’t worry Harvey! Here’s global warming 101: Global warming is the increase in the average temperature of Earth’s surface, air, and oceans. Green House gasses are gasses in the Earth’s atmosphere that collect heat and light from the sun. With too many GHG’s in the air, the Earth’s atmosphere will trap too much heat and the Earth will get too hot. This increase in global temperature could cause sea levels to rise and change the amount and patterns of precipitation. Other likely effects could include extreme weather conditions, species extinction and changes in agriculture.”I was speechless! What can we do to help Ken?Ken looked at me and smiled. “As a Citizen and Scientist I think it’s about social responsibility. Not through self denial but through better design. While scientists and geoengineers are working on better designs for solar, wind energy and planetary management , our citizens can help by simply recycling and perhaps driving less. Change a light bulb. Plant a tree. Harvey you do need agriculture for beauty!”Ken’s right! Well that sounds easy enough. I guess if each person cared we could make a difference one person at a time. Here is a link to Ken to find out more.With the devastating earthquake and tsunami in Japan I think that the most important thing on the earth, other than the actual planet, are the global citizens that inhabit it. In an instant their lives were changed forever. Here are two links to find out other ways to assist those in need:
http://www.samaritanspurse.org/index.php/articles/pray_for_japan/and http://www.disasterfunding.org/DisasterFunding.org.html
Also if you’re a person who prays, a little bit of love goes a long way.
 XO Harvey